Warrior Babes
Dawnie's Diary

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Entry One
 
Dear Diary
 
Nobody knows who I am not the real me. It's like nobody cares enough to find out. I mean does anyone ask me what I want to do with my life or what my opinion is on stff or what restaurant to order in from? NO!!! No one understands. No one has an older sister who's a Slayer. People wouldn't be so crazy about her if they had to live in the same house with her every single day. Everybody cares what she things. Just cause she can do backflips and stuff. Like that's such a crucial job skill in the real world plus Mom lets her get away with everything. Your sister's saving the world. I can so save the world if somebody handed me super powers. But I'd think of a cool name and wear a mask to protect my loved ones which Buffy doesn't even. If this town wasn't so lame everybody would completely know what she does. Then I bet they wouldn't even be that impressed because like killing things with wood. Oh scary vampires, they die from a splinter. Riley my sister's boyfriend is so into her. They're always kissing and groping. I bet they've had sex. 
 
Entry Two
 
Dear Diary
 
I don't think Buffy's Watcher likes me too much. I think it's cause he's just so old. I'm not sure how old he is but I heard him use the word newfangeled one time. So he's gotta be pretty far gone. Willow's the awesomest person. She's the only one I know who likes school as much as me. Ever her friends are cool like Tara. She and Willow are both Witches. They do spells and stuff which is so much cooler than slaying. I told Mom one time I'd wish they'd teach me some of the things they do together and then she got really quiet and made me go upstairs. I guess her generationg isn't coold with Witchcraft. Xander is so much cuter than anyone and smarter too. He totally skipped college and got a job working construction which is so kind of deep you know. He builds things and he's brave too. Just last week he went under cover to stop that Dracula guy. Xander treats everyone like an equal. He doesn't look down on people even when he should. He says I'm like a kid sister but sometimes I feel like he see's me as I am as a woman. Buffy probably would have got in way more trouble but I guess it was pretty ok for her not to say anything to Mom. Anya's gonna be ok and Xander's not made at me so stuff must have worked out. Not that Buffy's really changed at all like she ever would. She still thinks I'm Little Miss Nobody, just her dumb little sister. Boy is she in for a surprise.
 
Entry Three
 
Dear Diary
 
I finally got to go shopping with Mom. She should have known better than to send me off with Buffy and Giles. The poor guy was found dead on the floor in the magic shop and I was sent outside of course. I guess that's no surprise since Buffy was around and never lets me do anything. That guy outside was really weird. I'm guessing an escaped mental patient. That's the only thing that makes any sense. I am here which is like so obvious and last time I checked I wasn't a cat. No tail popping up or was he saying he was a cat. Whatever! Some people are just so strange. At least Tara came out to keep me company and we thumb wrestled. So it looks like I'll be able to go to the magic shop since Giles bought the place. I'm thinking that wasn't the greatest idea since we found the previous owner dead on the floor but whatever. Maybe I can look around when no one's looking and I could sneak a peek at all the cool stuff that must be in there. Slip a book inot my bag since Mom went all weird when I wanted Willow and Tara to teach me stuff. I could teach myself and show them all. I will never get why girls wear thongs. Oh joy a string up my butt that's a thrill and I can get panyt liners for my thong. Sure I'm rushing to the store and that's topping the list.
 
Entry Four
 
Dear Diary
 
Now that was scary when Mom passed out like that but I did good. I called the ambulance and rode along. It was cool with the sirens doing the whirry thing. I'm just glad that she's ok. That Ben guy was cute and even let me use his stethoscope which turned out to be a good thing since I'm the one that discovered that Riley's heart was going super fast. See I do come in handy after all since Buffy wasn't the one to figure this out. I was just trying to help out sharing my government knowledge when Buffy just took off. That Ben was cute but he's no Xander. He's still with Anya unfortunately. Doesn't he know that there is someone that is so perfect for him than her. Ok I know it can't happen with me since I'm all underage but it could happen some day. It's just that boys my age are such idiots. I hope Riley's ok since that so sucks that he was all experimented on and stuff. I actually kinda like the guy. I just wish he would stop calling me kid. He does make Buffy happy and he doesn't turn evil when they have sex. Which in my opinion is a big plus since going on a killing spree is so not good.
 
Entry Five
 
Dear Diary
 
Well I didn't want to see Buffy do whatever magic she's doing anyway. Stinky much! Couldn't she get a better flavor of incense like chocolate or even people. She thinks she's so special with her Slayerness. Mr Giles' magic shop was pretty cool. It had a lot of magic junk and stuff. I have better things to do than wasting my time on smelly incense. Is that like a requirement of magic stuff? Maybe I'll ask Willow since she's so cool unlike some people. If Buffy can do the slaying thing why not me doing the magic stuff. I could do it so better than her.
 
Later
 
What is her deal anyway? Buffy barges into my room and totally wigs out and says I'm not her sister. Like it's some special thrill to be related to her. I think I'm going to make some tea since Mom will probably be back soon. I hope she gets better soon. Maybe if she's up to it she could look over my paper that I'm doing for English.
 
Entry Six
 
Dear Diary
 
Buffy decided to move back home. Oh the joy of helping her move back in. That's how I like spending my time. They still don't know what's wrong with Mom. I hope she gets better soon. I so got the perfect gift for Tara. She's a witch and every witch needs a broom. Too bad there isn't a flying broom like the Nimbus 2000. That would be so cool. I could just climb on and tell it where I want to go or whatever. And I thought I had it rough with a Slayer as a big sister although my theory about her being a Howler monkey is still a possibility. Poor Tara with her lousy family telling here she was a demon. I so don't blame her for doing the spell. I would have done the same thing in her place. I'm just glad that she didn't have to leave. That would have really sucked and Willow would have been crushed. Mom doesn't know I know but I totally know they are a couple. I'm not stupid and anyway they are so great together.
 
Entry Seven
 
Dear Diary
 
I wish this was all some nightmare or a horror movie on TV. Mom's really sick and I'm scared. Strange things have been happening. Why are people telling me I'm not here and that I don't belong? It was different when those strangers said it but when Mom said it I was really hurt. Buffy explained that it was just her tumor and that she didn't know what she was saying. I just need to remember that in case she says anything else strange. I'm glad that Buffy was around to kill that scary demon thing. Mom's going to  have her operation and I'm terrified. I know that I complain about Buffy but I'm glad to have her and that I'm not alone. She called Dad but he never called back. I gues she has more important things to do in Spain with his secretary. Willow got me this cool book that I'll try to read to help keep my mind off things. Not that I could really since I'm so worried. She just has to make it through ok. I need her so much and besides. I so can't be stuck alone with Buffy since that would so not be any fun at all.
 
Entry Eight
 
Dear Diary
 
Weirdness abounds here in Sunnydale. Mom had her operation and she's doing better. We even went out shopping and Mom put on some actual clothes instead of that funky robe. It could be one of those really cheesy horror movies they show late at night. In the dead of night it rises from the from the corner of the room where its been thrown off. It goes outside searching for victims to strangle. I could so make a movie out of that and besides there are so many crappy movies so why not one more? That was odd.  I wonder what  Buffy, Mom, and Mr Giles were talking about. I heard my name mentioned but it made no sense it was something about a key or whatever. The strangeness of adults. That was so rotten or Riley to up and leave like that. How utterly lame he is, Well it is so his loss and to think that I was starting to like him. There is this really cute new guy at school but my heart still belongs to Xander. He's still with Anya for reasons unknown to me. Maybe it's just sex or something or the fact that I'm jail bait. I know that it will never happen but it's just a fantasy that resides in my head. The cutie in my art class seems pretty cool. That biach Chrissy is so lame she like lives to mess with people and me in particular. I wonder what's going on since I so know there is something going on.
 
Entry Nine
 
Dear Diary
 
That girl that came to the house was strange. She was looking for a key. What's so special about a key? They are used to open door. Big whoop! I solved the Buffy birthday sitch. I am going to put shells on a frame with a picture of us. Simple and cheap. Everyone has been  acting really weird today. Anya was even stranger than usual and that's saying a lot since she's just strange. I bet Giles diary or journal or whatever he calls it has the answers to this weirdness. Maybe I'll break into the magic shop and see what he's written down. I think I know where to look. He had his book one second and it was gone the next. Maybe I can finally find out what's going on since no one will tell me. I should be in the loop on these things. There is something about some Hell God. Maybe that strange chick is the Hell God that Willow mentioned. That would explain why she kicked Buffy's ass.
 
Entry Ten
 
Dear Diary
 
My brain is still reeling from everything. This diary is the only one that didn't suffer water or fire damage. It's the only one that I actually wrote even though I remember having a diary since I was like seven. So I popped into being about the time Dracular came into town. I'm so glad that I didn't get into trouble for the whole fire thing. I was upset and wigged out. I'm still upset since I don't know what I am. Am I human? I don't even know and I'm all confused about everything. It just got to me to hear Buffy say that I wasn't her sister. They weren't too thrilled about my breaking into the magic shop with Spike. I think I'll go see Spike after school. It'll be cool to hang out with him. He's not twitchy like the others. It is so gross that he has blood in his fridge but I guess him being a vampire and all would need it. I  don't think I'd make a good one with the whole blood thing. He is pretty cool though. I just love his hair and that is such a cool jacket that he has. He treats me like a person and not some kind of alien.
 
Entry Eleven
 
Dear Diary
 
Lately things have been like a nightmare. That seems to be a recurring theme. I noticed that Buffy was like numb for a while there. I thought she didn't care since she was all cold but it turned out to be an act for my benefit. She ws trying to hold it together but it's not like she can replace Mom. I was so close to bringing her back but I changed my mind. It was the right thing to do since it wouldn't really be her anyway. It was sweet of Spike to help me though. I think he actually cared about her. He is such a confusing person er well vampire being all nice and making that robot that looked like Buffy. I doubt that he was playing checkers with it. He's in love or obsessed or whatever with her. He was so doing it with his robot which is so gross. There lies the confusion since he goes back and forth between being a sweetie and a total repugnant slug. I guess he's sort of forgiven on account of the torture and not telling Glory about me. So he's not totally evil. Oh great the school called Buffy about my cutting so she has to come in to talk to the principal. I sense a lecture coming on which will so suck. It's been a bad time so what's the harm in blowing off a few classes. I suffered a major loss here. I also found out that my very existence has been a lie which is still kinda confusing although it's nice to know that I am now human. Sometimes I think I was just dreaming and that I'll walk into the kitchen and find Mom there. Why did she have to die? I really need her and miss her. I know Buffy's trying and doing the best she can but she's not Mom but I guess I'm kinda glad that I have her around since Dad is still AWOL.
 
Entry Twelve
 
Dear Diary
 
I never thought that I could be taken away. That's why Buffy started acting like a dictartor after talking to the principal. I'm just scared and I'm being hunted for who knows what and now this. Everything that has happened has totally been my fault. Spike was beaten senseless and now poor Tara has had her brain sucked out. Maybe I am evil since everyone I care about suffers and or dies. I'm the reason this happened since they'd all be fine if I didn't exist. I wonder what I am or what I was before I was turned into a girl. Even though Spike and Buffy told me I wasn't to blame I still feel guilty about what's happened. I'm just glad that Willow wasn't hurt when she went up against Glory. That was so brave of her and very romantic too. She loves Tara and when you love someone you want to protect them so I don't blame her for going after that biach. Me and Buffy are going to go over to see Willow and Tara tomorrow since they are releasing her from the hospital in the morning. I wonder if she can be fixed. It's so sad. Pain just seems to be a major part of life especially lately.
 
 

                                                                                                                                             

2001-2002
 
Entry One
 
Dear Diary
 
So much has happened in such a short time. I sometimes feel like this is just a bad dream. There goes that recurring theme again but it's a real nightmare not one that I can just wake up from. But she's gone she's really gone. She told me to be strong but I'm not sure if I can. I wish that I could pinch myself and wake up. It should have been me not her but she wouldn't let me do it. I miss her so much. Willow fixed the Buffybot so I sort of have Buffy in a way. When I can't sleep I go into the room with her and just lay beside her. It helps a little but it's just not the same. Willow and Tara have moved in which helps a lot. Everyone decided to cover up her death. I still can't totally believe it. I expect her to just show up in the living room or soemthing. Dad never even called back so if the truth came out I'd be put like in foster care or something since he won't show up. I'd rather be with Willow and Tara.
 
Entry Two
 
Dear Diary
 
Well the went really well which is strange. I guess these people are out of it since a robot totally fooled them but I guess that shouldn't be a surprise in this town. Everyone just loved the bUffybot. It's sort of like still having a sister. I thought they were going to declare a holiday or throw a parade or something. They couldn't even tell that it was a robot. Shows how smart they are or rather how not smart they are. Cool Spike is coming over tonight. I so don't like having a babysitter but at least he talks to me like an equal instead of a kid. I'm so not a kid especially after all I've been thoguht. The others still won't let me go out on patrol. I could so dust a vampire. All I need is something made of wood that has a pointy end. Spike could so give me lessons in the art of slaying. Anya does it so why not me too? She's strange but I guess she's ok for an ex demon. I guess she grows on you after a while and she seems to make Xander happy. I think I'll order a pizza for dinner.
 
Entry Three
 
Dear Diary
 
Buffy's back and it so isn't a dream. I thought I'd lost her forever but she's back in the flesh. Giles came back and I identified my first demon. I even pronounced the name right. That was so strange last week when that demon went inside me and made me breathe fire. Now that would be handy since fire could pretty much kill every demon under the sun or should I say moon. Buffy didn't get the loan. They should have after she saved the peopel in the bank from that demon. Ok money was stolen but no one was hurt which is totally more important. Maybe Anya's idea about charging isn't such a crazy idea after all. Maybe those that can afford it can give her a tip or something. I wonder how things went with Angel. She went to see him since he thought she was dead too and was totally devastated of course since he loves her so much. That is so sad that they can't ever be together. They are really star crossed lovers with a evil curse keeping them apart forever. I could maybe earn some money babysitting. There should be a Slayer trust fund since Buffy does save the world and stuff over and over again. Since she came her the death rate has dropped. That deserves something.
 
Entry Four
 
Dear Diary
 
Halloween didn't go as planned. Janice got us hooked up with a couple of vampires. I had no idea and he was so nice and not all vampy except for him going all bumpy. So my first kiss was with a vampire. I ended up giving him the sharp end of my pencil. So I dusted my first vamp and all on my own. That I'm staying over at Janice's or whoever line won't work again any time soon. Giles did the whole lecture thing. I'm a teen and this is what we do. Doesn't he remember that far back?
 
Entry Five
 
Dear Diary
 
That was so strange that whole singing and dancing thing. I almost when to Hell with that well dressed demon to become his Queen just because I put that necklace on. That is so not fair. So Buffy wasn't suffering at all in some Hell dimension. I don't know how to help Buffy. Why did everyone assume that she was in Hell anyway? I guess because she jumped and went through that gateway thing. I think that if a person is good they wouldn't go to Hell. Sure she drives me nuts but she's my sister and that's what they do but she doesn't deserve Hell for that. That would make no sense at all. I'm just glad that the demon left by himself since I wasn't looking forward to a trip to Hell although Buffy wanted to go in my place. She can really be cool sometimes. Spike was so great when he stopped Buffy from bursting into flames. I couldn't bear losing her again after I just got her back. It will take time but I know that things will get better. They just have too.
 
Entry Six
 
Dear Diary
 
It was so strange when we all lost our memories. Willow did a spell that went wrong and Tara left her because of it. It just won't be the same without her. Tara and Willow are so great togheter. So I'm keeping my fingers crossed that they'll get back together. That wasn't very smart to mess with Tara's head like that although her heart was in the right place. So the house is full of despari and tears. Buffy is still strugging though she tries not to show it when she's around. She goes out a lot. I guess sometimes a person needs to be alone. I'm thinking that the memory flooding back had to hit her pretty hard. I don't know what to do about that since I could never understand. It'll jsut take time so I'll let her have it and hopefully soon she'll be back to normal. Well Janice today mentioned introducing me to a guy but I'm not so sure considering what happened last time. It'll have to be in daylight to make sure he isn't sporting fangs. She wants me to call later with my answer. Why not I'm sure I can go since it'll be on Saturday and in the afternood. Buffy was pretty cool about the whole lying thing. Giles left which was such bad timing since Buffy needs him more than ever. But no he flies off to England although it was cool of him to help out with the money sitch.
 
Entry Seven
 
Dear Diary
 
It was nice to hang out with Tara although it turned into a sleepover. Buffy and Willow didn't come home last night. Tara is so sad but she's really worried about Willow and the magick thing. I guess she might have a point since Willow and Amy magicked the town last night. So everyone's asleep and Tara left. She couldn't leave fast enough after hearing about Willow's night out. So I'm the only one awake so maybe I'll see what Janice is up to since here is Dullsville. Maybe a little shopping to brighten my day. I am running low on lipgloss.
 
Entry Eight
 
Dear Diary
 
Now that was the night from Hell. I thought we were just going out for dinner and a movie but no movie. Instead she dragged me off to this creepy place and she came out with her eyes all black and scary. She's like a junkie and she could have killed me with the wreck or that ugly demon that came with her fix. So I now have a fracture and I'm in a sling. So I do have a souvenir from a night I'd rather forget. So now we have to remove all temptations like Coco Pelley who I love and candles. According to Buffy they are like bongs to witches. I am mad at her since that statue was Mom's. It's like she wants to forget about her or something.
 
Entry Nine
 
Dear Diary
 
I feel like everyone's avoiding me. Is it me? Buffy is always gone doing the Slaying or flipping thing. I think she doesn't want to be here. She was so quick to want to turn herself in for that girl's murder. Well the murder turned out not to be Buffy's fault so she's not leaving yet anyway. She's not really here anyway so she may as well leave. Did she like expect me to jump up and down at the news that she's not leaving? If what Buffy said was ture she must love me a lot after all you hurt the ones you love. I thought things would get better but they haven't. I feel all alone and it's like no one notices. Buffy's birthday is coming up so at least for a little while I'll have some time with her. Would that be such a horrible thing?
 
Entry Ten
 
Dear Diary
 
That was so strange. I made a wish like people tend to do all the time and I got it only not like I thought. Not that I was thinking that it would come true anyway since it was just wishful thinking on my part. The house turned into a prison so no one could leave so Buffy's birthday turned into a slumber part. It turns out that the guidance counselor I talked to was a vengeance demon or as she put it a justice demon. Whatever! It did get pretty hairy with that guy getting stabbed and Anya ripping apart my room. So my secre'ts out. My days of petty crime are over. I'll have to do hard time at the Magic Box. The one good thing is that Buffy didn't run out of the house like the others did. Well they had to get that guy to the hospital and stuff. At least that guy is ok but he won't be asking Buffy out like ever. Anya must have been pretty scary when she was a vengeance demon.
 
Entry Eleven
 
Dear Diary
 
I got so busted on the whole stealing thing. It took long enough to even notice. It's like no one even sees me but I guess they do now. Buffy made me return everything and I'll have to pay for what I can't. At least I didn't get carted off to jail. I'm spending more time with Buffy. Things seem to be getting better. At least I'm not getting totally ignored like before. So I am only able to go to the pet store since I stole stuff from all the other stores. I really made the rounds. I'll be in debt for like ever and I'll have to be endentured to Anya for all eternity. I didn't realize that I'd stolen so much stuff. I gues it adds up when you've been doing it for a while. I'm a little surprised about Anya letting me work in the shop. She'll be watching me like a hawk and may even search me every time I leave. I won't mention that since I don't want her getting any ideas.
 
Entry Twelve
 
Dear Diary
 
So Riley returns along with a wife. At least this time he said goodbye and didn't call me kid. Things are getting better with the wedding coming up. I so think they'll get a stripper but I'll be over at Janice's. We're going to have a seance which should be cool. So I'll just leave them to do whatever people do before getting married since it's still a little strained around here. I'm really happy though for Anya and Xander. They are so good together. Well I geuss I better get my stuff together and leave before an interrogation begins.
 
Entry Thirteen
 
Dear Diary
 
Well there was no wedding but blood was shed. A demon well one that tried to kill Anya anyway since half the guests were demons. That horned guy was nice. We compared notes on the messed upness of our families. Maybe I'll email him. For the life of me I couldn't even begin to spell or say his name. At least he has a easy email address to remember since it's HornedOne@yahoo.com. Hey maybe that's his name. I'm not sure since we just started talking and I'm not sure if we introduced ourselves. His family is just as messed as mine. Spike came with a total hosebag. So I wore that ugly dress for nothing. I thought they were happy but I guess looks can be deceiving.
 
Entry Fourteen
 
Dear Diary
 
Oh that's just great. Just when I think things are getting better Buffy tries to kill everyone. Sure she was under the influence of a demon but still. She was in a mental institution and Mom and Dad were there but I wasn't. That really hurt that I didn't  even exist in that other reality. She took the antidote so she'll be fine. She was so close to killing all of us. That doesn't exactly make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I guess I shouldn't blame her since she was poisoned or whatever by that demon but doesn't that mean the thought crossed her mind. I don't know what to think about it. I mean she did die for me so I should just be glad that things worked out in the end.
 
Entry Fifteen
 
Dear Diary
 
That was so creepy how those nerds have cameras all over and in the magick shop. Yikes Spike and Anya doing it and we all get a front row seat. It turns out that my suspicisions were right. I thought there might be something going on and this confirmed it. So things are pretty messed up right now since Xander's hurt and out for blood. He didn't kill Spike though he wanted to. They should have been happily married. Why can't things every turn out right? On the bright side Willow and Tara are talking which is a good thing. They so belong together. Some people are just meant to be. Sure for a while I wasn't that crazy about Anya but she really loves Xander and that's why she's so hurt and had that revenge sex but I am disappointed in Spike. Who knows if they'll ever get back together? This whole Spike thing has made the sitch even worse. At least Willow got rid of all those cameras. Now that is way creepy to find out that you're being watched like all the time or who knows when and what you're doing. I might have to doublecheck since I've got goosebumps at the thought of that.
 
Entry Sixteen
 
Dear Diary
 
This is so great. I woke up to find Willow and Tara together in the together sense that Tara spent the night. I am so happy for them. They so belong together and it's about time that things work out for someone. I'm going to spend the night at Janice's. But first I think I'll pay Spike a visit to give him a piece of my mind. He supposedly loves Buffy yet he slept with Anya. Sure that makes sense. Not! If you truly love someone you just don't do something like that. Well I'm going to get my stuff together for tonight.
 
Entry Seventeen
 
Dear Diary
 
Now that was intense. The past few days have been a blur. Buffy gets shot and Tara killed. So someone else I love died and Buffy almost did too again. Willow went totally insane and came close to ending the world. She was so scary. I really thought I could talk to her but that so didn't work. Maybe I should have stayed at the crypt with Clem. That was sweet of him to acknowledge the fact that I'm not a kid. He's a really sweet demon. I'm not sure what kind he is but he's nice although I don't like him playing poker with kittens since that is so not right. Maybe I'll talk to him about that next time I see him. I fought those dirt things. Well you can learn a lot by watching. Maybe now I can help instead of always being sheltered. At least everyone is all in one piece although Giles got pretty banged up. He's going to be fine but lumpy for a while. In fact he took Willow off to England to see if she can be helped. I hope she can because she is really sc rewed up. My whole shoplifting thing pales in comparison. Things are so strange and Anya has gone all demony again. The other two nerds escaped to who knows where and in my opinion Warren got what he deserved except for the part where Willow nearly destroyed everything. I can't believe that I'll never see Tara again or eat her pancakes. This is just too tragic. I am thinking about putting all of us in sleep chambers for the summer since that seems to be the time when those I love die right before the start of summer. That is so odd but it's true.
 
 
  

2002-2003
 
Entry One
 
Dear Diary
 
I am so nervous about going to High School. A brand new schol full of strangers which could be a plus but it's intimidating too. I could reinvent myself and be totally cool or I could be a total freak which wouldn't be so cool. Sunnydale High is back again and Buffy is majorly freaked out about it. That just makes me more nervous. So I've made a breakthrough with Buffy. She's going to take me out for some slaying. That will be so cool and it's about time too. I'll finally be a full fledge member of the Scoobies fighting all the ooglie booglies that go bump in the night. It's not as though I've never staked a vampire since I did that one time on Halloween. Well I better get some dinner before Buffy gets home so we can go out after.
 
Entry Two
 
Dear Diary
 
I made it through my night of slaying and the first day of school. I wonder who's brillain idea it was to rebuild the school on the same spot not to mention building it smack dab on the Hellmouth to start with. That was the worst idea ever. The class of 99 did us all a favor by blowing it up and they ruined their good work by building it again. It's probably all oever the school how I flipped out in class and how my sister came in and was all weird. So I'm assured freak status with people pointing and staring. It's not my fault that I was attacked by a ghost thing. Good thing Buffy gave me that cell phone. So the princiapl offered Buffy a job and of course she accepted since it gives her the perfect excuse to hang around. I'm not so sure I like that. Ok she did come in handy but I do need my own space. Actually she'll probably be great at this job but still I don't want her popping up all over the place and stalking me around the school.
 
Entry Four
 
Dear Diary
 
I certainly don't want to run into a gnarl demon again. He kinda reminded me a little of Gollulm but it's a long way from Middle Earth and I'm no Hobbit although it looks like a cool place to live in the Shire like they do. I'm so glad that I can feel again and move since that so sucked being all stiff like that. Willow's back and she didn't slip which is a very good thng. She was so nervous about seeing us that we didn't and she didn't. I was nervous myself  but she seems to be the Willow we all know and love. I hope it stays that way. She's still living here and I'm totally fine with it since I care about her and want her around and it's her home. How alone she must have felt with that thing eating her. Good thing they got to her in time and that Anya was able to see her.
 
Entry Five
 
Dear Diary
 
I made a friend named Cassie. It's just a shame that it was such a short friendship. I am glad though since she was really special. Buffy had me go to her but I really liked her. She did die after all like she said she would. Why did her heart have to give out on her? It's just so sad to think that I'll never see her again and of all the things she'll miss and I'll miss out on having a great friend maybe even a best friend in her. Buffy feels like she failed but she didn't because she did save Cassie from being killed by those stupid boys. She didn't Cassie's heart did. People die and there's nothing to stop that. All you can do is go on and make the best of what you have. I'm going to the funeral even though I didn't know her for long. How cool that she had a website. She wrote some cool poems. Sure they are gloomy but in a good way. Writing stuff down can totally help in getting things off your chest. It's like therapy without the couch and the shrink writing stuff down and nodding. I even made a stab at some poems myself. I think I'll have some chocolate since it's supposed to be comfort food.
 
Entry Six
 
Dear Diary
 
I have literally fallen for the hottest guy like ever. The guy with the Letterman's Jacket. I am so in love with him I even heard music  playing. What a lucky break that that vending machine fell on that girl. This is so perfect. I'll just borrow Buffy's old cheerleading outfit. I'll become a part of the team. I'll even make up my own cheer since he's the most important part of the team. I looked into his eyes and saw his soul. He's the man of my dreams. I'm head over heels with love with this guy. We are going to be together forever.
 
Entry Seven
 
Dear Diary
 
Oh the horrors of tryouts. I make up a great cheer and everything goes totally wrong. I made a total fool of myself and RJ had a front row seat to see me in my utter mortification. This wasn't supposed to happen. How can I face him after this? Buffy just doesn't understand. This isn't a crush it's love. There has to be a way to make it right. We are like destined to be together. It's like written in the stars or something. She can't understand since she like knows nothing about true love. She doesn't have the best track record. I'll be with RJ regardless of what she thinks since she doesn't matter and it's not like it's any of her business anyway.
 
Entry Eight
 
Dear Diary
 
Well we all went totally insane and I almost got smashed like a bug by a train to prove my love. How totally stupid is that? I can't believe that I was going to kill myself to prove my love for a guy that I didn't even know. I never even found out his last name. That's like the dumbest thing in the world. I didn't even know the guy. I was just consumed with him like he swallowed me whole. I'm so not looking forward to the whole love thing if that's how it goes. I guess suicide doesn't usually come into the picture. I know it was that jacket with a spell on it but it felt so real. The jacket is ashes now. It even worked on Willow and she likes girls. She nearly turned him into a girl. That would have been interesting to see if it would actually work. Would it have worked if a girl was wearing it to attract guys? Not that I'd ever do that since it tends to be guys that have the jerk disease.
 
Entry Nine
 
Dear Diary
 
I never thought I'd get sleep after last night. Willow things it was fake because she saw someone too but it was so real. I think something was trying to stop Mom from talking to me. I even did an exorcism and she came but the things she said. It's like I'm torn because I want it to have been her but if it was that would make everything she said true. She warned about bad things coming so I don't know what to think. It's just that I really miss her. I guess it could have been fake since fake could seem real and Willow saw someone too so it was like the night for talking to dead people. Maybe the Hellmouth can tap into your brain and make you see stuff. It's just that Buffy's the only family I have left with Mom dead and I guess deep down I have that fear that Buffy will leave me too.
 
Entry Ten
 
Dear Diary
 
So Spike might be killing again. If that's true that could mean that what Mom said was true even if it wasn't really Mom. So I'm hoping that Spike didn't do it which would make the other night just evil messing with my head. Even if he is killing again doesn't mean that what happened was true. But Anya said that she always told the truth when she was evil. That is so strange because I would lie all the time if I was evil. Not that telling a lie makes you evil but a honest evil doer just doesn't sound all that evil to me. I mean wouldn't part of the fun be that? Maybe Spike has totally lost it since he was all crazy in the basement. He did knock out Xander after all so Buffy went off to find him. There should be evil insurance or something since the house keeps getting totally trashed.
 
Entry Eleven
 
Dear Diary
 
I'm not so sure about this whole Spike staying with us thing. I mean he went back to killing people so shouldn't he be meeting the pointy end of a stake. It's just creepy that he's here and he's left who knows how many bodies around ready to join the ranks of the undead. Buffy thinks that the evil is messing around with him big time and made him do the killing but that isn't very comforting. It's a good thing that Xander is around to make the house all liveable again what with the shattered window and all. So Buffy wants to get close to Spike which I guess makes a crazy kind of sense. She does have a point about it but I'll be ready to send him up in flames if he goes near me. I know that we need to figure out what the next big bad is but this isn't the greatest idea in the world.
 
Entry Twelve
 
Dear Diary
 
Well things just go from bad to worse. Giles showed up with some Slayers in waiting which is so odd. I didn't do too bad when I was fighting those robey guys. I'm disappointed that I didn't get to hit the nerdy guy. It's like Slayer Central here. My mac and cheese didn't turn out and Spike was taken and who knows what is being done to him. I actually feel a little bad for the guy. My cooking expereinces never seem to work well like that peanut butter omlette. So it's a full house and I have to go to school which sucks. I mean the world could like totally end with these makers of evil. That is so not good. Well we'll figure it out since we did beat a Hell God after all but I don't want any dying except for the bad guys. It's so strange that no one else knows what's going on. They go about their lives totally clueless. I'm thinking that wouldn't be the worst thing in the world since ignorance is bliss. This should so get me out of my homework since I'm like trying to  save the world is so much more important. But I guess my teachers wouldn't go for it.
 
Entry Thirteen
 
Dear Diary
 
Wow that was quite a speech Buffy made. She was all thrashed and looking really bad but she was totally amazing. I was scared when I saw her looking all half dead and stuff. But she is tough and she totally didn't let it keep her down. The house is totally overflowing with people. Too bad we can't use magick to make the house grow so I don't trip over the wannabe Slayers or the nerd boy. We could make a room just for him and I could smack him around. Actually I think they aren't going to be all that helpful since so far they seem pretty pathetic. I mean I at least have seen vamps and even done some slaying. I could do better than them well Kennedy isn't too bad and I think she totally has a crush on Willow. It's just so weird that time just slipped on into Decemeber well I'm off school which is always a good thing.
 
Entry Fourteen
 
Dear Diary
 
Well the big ugly has been dusted. It's a good thing that there was only one of those uber vamps since it wasn't your typical pointy end and dust kill. But she did it and she was amazing. That thing was super tough but it's dust now. I am like so proud of her since she'll totally kick the first's ass. She got Spike out and man did he look bad. It was worse than the time he got tortured by Glory. I wonder how many girls are coming since we are on total overload. I so don't like sharing a room. At least I'm still in my own bed which I refuse to give up. I wonder if they'll get Faith since she's a Slayer too. Sure she's a pyscho and all but she turned from the dark side when she turned herself in which should be a good sign. I mean Willow went all scary and evil but now she's back to her old self.
 
Entry Fifteen
 
Dear Diary
 
More girls are showing up so no more room of my own. The only place to get some privacy is the bathroom and that doesn't last long. It was so strange when I thought I was a potential. I was torn of course but it was kind of cool too since I'd be part of this amazing thing but I'm not since it was Amanda. That was so sweet what Xander said to me and I totally know that he meant it and wasn't just trying to cheer me up. He said I was extraordinary. That made me feel good since I was kinda down. I guess that's why I've been doing major research since I want to be helpful. Well me and Xander are the regular people and it can be hard when all those people are part of this special group and here we are on the outside looking in.
 
Entry Sixteen
 
Dear Diary
 
Maybe I could be a Watcher since I'm getting the hand of the research thing. A new generation of Watchers since the others except for Giles and maybe a few others who I don't know the names of are all dead. Does a person have to be English to be one since they all seem to be. I really don't know what I want to be. Fighting evil is good and all but it doesn't exactly pay the bills. Maybe we could open an agency like Angel and the others did in LA. I guess thinking about the future is out now since we need to figure out how to fight this thing. So Spike is all fixed up now since Riley came through. That was so amazing of him to send help. We need all the help we can get and Spike's a good fighter when he's not all insane or killing people.
 
Entry Seventeen
 
Dear Diary
 
How weird to find out that Principal Wood is the son of a Slayer. So I guess that rules him out as being evil. I think it's so strange that he sits at his desk right above the mouth of Hell like that each day. It kinda gives me the creeps. Poor Xander had a horrible date since he got yet another demon chick again and was stabbed. He wanted to turn gay but he'd probably just attract boy demons. Well Clem is a sweetie. I'm just glad that he's ok since his date nearly summoned another one of thos Turok Han vamps. We so don't need another one of those things.
 
Entry Eighteen
 
Dear Diary
 
My Summerian's getting better although it helped when that book changed to English. That Slayer bag had such a funky smell. Another potential has died courtesy of the first. Buffy got all crabby but she had a point. We all have to do something. Anya for instance since she just sits back waiting to be rescued. At least Andrew bakes and he has that chart going for him. That guy should so get some new clothes. At least he's bathing regularly and cleaning his one set of clothes that he has had for like months. I think it's the same thing he was wearing when he left town. Hmm that could be a good excuse to go to the mall since they don't like me going alone after that whole shoplifting thing. Well I haven't stolen anything so yeah me.
 
Entry Nineteen
 
Dear Diary
 
As usual things got a bit hairy but at least I got to get some time off from school. THat is something I never get tired of. Well Andrew finally wore new clothes since I was so over that whole mime look of his. Usually a guy all in black is sexy but not for him. He's goofy but he kinda grows on you and he's kinda sweet. Ok it was a bit annoying with his camera but the things he said were really sweet. I think it's cool that Willow and Kennedy are all cozy again. I'm so happy for her. Well that seal thing at school has been closed so I guess no more ugly vamps. That's such a good thing since the last one was tricky to kill. Maybe I'll do some training too since it's only right that I can take care of myself. Buffy's been busy with the potentials so my Slay lessons have stopped and it took so long before she gave in and started giving me lessons. I'm not just gonna sit back since this is my fight too. I mean I can't be all researchy all the time. At least the sun is back in LA. That has to be so weird to have the sun gone. I wonder if that's why Angel called but he hung up. It's just good that it's back although I'm not sure how. Willow and Cordelia used to email all the time wit news but not lately. I guess things there are pretty crazy too.