I'll Never Tell
This is the man that I plan to entangle
Isn't he fine?
My claim to fame was to maim and mangle
Vengeance was mine but I'm out of the biz
The made I made I'll trade for his
The only trouble is I'll never tell
She is the one she's such wonderful fun, such passion, and grace
Warm in the night when I'm in her tight embrace tight embrace
I'll never let her go the love we've known can only grow
There's just one thing no I'll never tell
Cause there's nothing to tell
He snores
She wheezes
Say housework and she freezes
She eats these stinky cheeses that I can't describe
I talk, he breezes
She doesn't know what please is
His penis got diseases from a Shumash tribe
The vibe gets kinda scary
Like she thinks I'm ordinary
Like it's all just temporary
Like her toes are kinda hairy
But it's all very well
Cause God knows I'll never tell
When things get rough he just hides behind his Buffy
Now look he's getting huffy
Cause he knows that I know
She clings she's needy she's also really greedy
She enver
His eyes are beady
This is my verse Hello she
You know you're quite the charmer
My knight in shining armor
You're the cutest of the Scoobies
with lips as red as rubies
And your firm yet supple tight embrace
He's swell
She's sweller
He'll always be my feller
That's why I'll never tell her that I'm petrified
I've read this tale
There's wedding then betrayal
I know there'll come the day
I'll want to run and hide
I lied I said it's easy
I've tried but there's these fears I can't quell
Is she looking for a pot of gold?
Will I look good when I've gotten old?
Will our lives become too stressful
if I'm never that successful?
When I get so old and wrinkley
that I look like David Brinkley?
Am I crazy?
Am I dreamin?
Am I marrying a demon?
We could really raise the beam
in making marriage a Hell
So, thank God I'll never tell
I swear that I'll never tell
My lips are sealed
I take the fifth
Nothing to see, move it along
I'll never tell