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Kiwi Speak
Piss-up: social gathering
A bit of a worry: a troubling person
Wharfie: Longshoreman
Bolshie: a radical
Jag: amusing person
Sprog: give birth
Shout: round of drinks
Tall Poppy: one who excels
Ya mate: congratulations
Technicolour yawn: to vomit
Hoon: goon
Tiki Tour: scenic route
Flannel: washcloth
Stirrer: troublemaker
Bun Fight: social gathering with food
Guts for garters!: in big trouble A Beautiful Woman
Looks can be deceiving
Preparing her army
Wants a particular kill
Her mission is to kill Hercules
With a plan in mind
She acts the damsel in distress
Crosses pathes with Iolaus
She captures his heart
The perfect weapon
Coming between the two
He falls under her spell
Turning his back on his best friend
In the hopes for the kill
You know a true warrior attacks from the front. Hercules
Hard times breed hard people Iolaus. There's no avoiding that. My father was killed in battle and so were all three of my brothers. I won't be. Xena
A true warrior would understand that you demoralize and weaken before you destroy. Xena
What Hercules Thinks Of Xena
A murderer, a crazy woman whose only purpose in life is to kill and conquer.
Helpful Tips: She kills warriors who don't follow her code. To drive the wedge deeper between two best friends at odds pretend he beat you up and to make it even more authentic muss up your hair, add some dirt and some cuts and bruises for that added touch of realism.
The Turning Point
With her own code
Never killing women and children
Orders disobeyed while she's gone
Found everyone slaughtered
A baby's cry is heard
The only one left alive
He was overlooked
Stepping in she saves his life
Her authority is questioned
Another has taken command
Made to walk the gauntlet
The only one to ever survive it
She starts down a new path
We are warriors not barbarians. Xena
Salmoneus' Advice
There's more than one way to wage a war. Well a army such as your's with such a beautiful leader like you, you need publicity, public relations. No you need someone to trumpet your victory but you don't want to seem overbearing or merciless. You need a theme song. Wait a second.
Xena coming to your town
Xena don't you wear a frown
Don't talk about destruction talk about collateral damage. Be like a tax collector tell poeple you're doing it for their own good. Ok can I just yeah...Always address you troops from your right side it's your best side. Not that you have a bad side. You've got beautiful eyes. You've got great cheek structure. Smile more. Show off your cheeks.
Easy victories make for weak soldiers. Xena
I don't want soldiers following me out of greed. I demand loyalty. Xena
I don't run from my problems I confront them. Xena
The Guantlet
Two rows of men and at the end there is a line drawn in the dirt. Once you're across you are safe. You make your way down the line and the men start beating on you with sticks. You're armor is removed and you have no weapons to fight with except your fists. To date Xena has been the only one to survive this. Starting Over
Turning things around
Righting a grevious wrong
Out to stop Darfus
His spread of evil
Teams up with Hercules
See's a change in her
Saw the goodness in her heart
A reluctant Iolaus too
Fighting side by side
Getting really close
Feelings grow and develop
He unchained her heart
Out to make up for her past
Not an easy road ahead
Proving the change in her
Hercules On Xena
Xena doesn't accept pity. She's a warrior in the truest sense of the word.
The Many Horrors
I have done terrible things. I've killed so many men that I'll never wash their blood from my hands. But when you help people you honor the wife and children Hera stole from you. There is nothing in my whole life that moves me that way.
Salmoneus' Notes
As warriors Hercules and Xena have always been a perfect match. I find myself wondering about them falling in love, getting married, having children, hiring me to handle their finances.
Her Regrets About Iolaus
I'll go to my grave regretting that. I was all twisted up by hate probably the same feeling you have towards me.
Preparing For Battle
You know I've been in a hundred other battles and the only thing that's ever come over me before them was a cold rage but now...
Sometimes you can only defeat evil with evil. Hercules
Warrior Princess
Her name is Xena
Comes from Amphipolis
Expert with the sword
Amazing fighting skills
Tops in the known world
Once wrapped up in evil
She turned from her dark ways
Saved the life of a child
Chance to turn things around
Burdened by her past
She very nearly gave it all up
Saved a little village
Got her mother back
A new friendship and companion to travel with
Long way to go to make amends
The Village Girl
Her name is Gabrielle
Comes from Potedia
The village Xena saved
Not wanting to marry
And become a good wife
She goes off after Xena
Meets a hungry cyclops
Talks her way out of being a meal
Saves Xena from being stoned
Off on new adventures
Just over the horizon
Waiting to be written
Thus begins the Xena Scrolls
The Warlord
Draco is his name
Got a bit rough
Left a nasty scar
Something to remind him
His ultimate desire
Xena in battle or love
Denied of both
Agreed to a fight
Man of his word
No rest for the wicked
Joxer The Mighty
A mighty warrior he's not
Pummled senseless by Gabrielle
Wearing kitchen implements for armor
A pasta strainer strapped to his chest
Likes to fish and steal
A laddle rests on his shoulder
Helmet that could double as a pot
Failed to join Callisto's army
Gave her the name Warrior Queen
Refused to kill the irritating blonde
A new friendship was formed between the three
Callisto
Bent on revenge
Village burned to the ground
Lost her familly that day
Hatred ate away at her soul
Wants to destroy Xena
Shot her with a poison dart
To sully her good deeds
A psycho singing of rage
Able to catch the chakram
Only one of a select few
Knows how to handle a sword
Getting off on the killing
Laying all the guilt at Xena's feet
Sent off to jail where she belongs
The origins of the chakram go back to the ancient East and appear in histories both factual and mythological of China, the Sanskrit language and, in particular, India. Chakram (or charka)- A quoit weapon used mainly by Sikhs, unkown outside India. It consisted of a steel ring from 12 to 30 centimetres in diameter and between two and four centermeters in width, with a very sharp outer edge and a round inner edge, which was used to whirl the weapon around the forefinger before throwing. Another method of whirling consisted of holding the chakram between the thumb and the first finger and throwing it to coincide with the full swing of the body, like a discus. Its effective range was 40 to 40 metres. The surface of a chakram was usually quite plain, but some of these weapons show elaborately inlaid or line-engraved surfaces. Paintings and pictoria references to these times often showed several chakrams or war-quots worn by the Sikhs around their turbans, either for dress or as both weapons and head protection in battles. The chakrams would often be whirled around the forefinger before being released, or thrown underarm like the modern day Frisbee. There were different types of chakrams: the chakkar sada had a smooth sharp outer edge, while the chakkar katavdar's outer edge was serrated. In a description of a late 16th Century Indian army the inventory of weapons included steel wheels called chacarani, carried on the left arm or atop turbans. The earliest references include descriptions of the chakram in the myths and tales of the Mahabharata and Ramayana, traditional epics of the Indian people and their gods. According to some translations, each of the 32 Hindu gods had their own weapons, from battle axes to bows and arrows. In illustrations of those texts, the god Vishnu very clearly holds a chakram. As legend goes the chakram was given to Vishnu by an older god, Agni the fire god as a reward for overcoming another god Indra.
Source: The Complete Encyclopedia of Arms and Weapons edited by Leonid Tarassuk & Claude Blair
The Song Of Life
I ask the Muse, Goddess of Poetry, to aid me in
this song of Xena, the Warrior Princess, my friend - Gabrielle
My world was small:
A little village among mountains, with its little fields.
Learned what girls must learn, to become good wives.
I looked up at the bowl of sky between our mountains
And sang to myself while I sat weaving at the loom,
Stories we heard from the traveling bards who sometimes came,
And the songs of heroes deeds
The old folks sing in the evenings.
I was growing taller and changing.
Young men began to look at me with different eyes.
My parents were talking of marriage.
My spirit pushed inside me,
My heart hurt in the cool fragrant evenings,
when wild geese called, high in the autmn sky.
I yearned, but knew not why.
Then you came, my friend
Fierce and wonderful, black hair blowing
Beautiful like a dark Artemis, Huntress of the Mountains,
Stronger than the heroes in the songs,
Your long blade in your hand!
When They First Meet
That thing you did with the hooop that was amazing. Where did you get that? Did you make it yourself? And that kick you do you've got to teach me.
You've got to take me with you, and teach me everything you know. You can't leave me.
Xena I'm not cut out for this village life. I was born to do so much more.
I'm going to be a warrior. Gabrielle
Xena's Advice
You could hire yourself out to a village as a protector. Even a blind cyclops would scare most folks off. I'm sure that the villagers would toss you a sheep every one and then for payment.
Being an adventeress isn't that hard. Gabrielle
Immortal Father Zeus in Heaven curse this brute if he eats me.
Torture him with the slain serpents blood and the crows droppings...
Helpful Tip: If you are caught by a cyclops start talking since they don't like chatty food. Also use your smarts if you don't have the brawn since it's pretty easy to outwit one since they tend to be dumb and being blind on top of that makes it even easier to avoid being dinner.
Gabrielle Saves Xena
Let me throw some logic at you. Now hold on now let's say that you're right and she's Draco's buddy let's say that she's even his girlfriend. Well what have you accomplished. You think that Draco's bad news now what do you think he'll be like when he hear's that you've knocked off his woman. Oh booy it gives me the creeps to even think about it.
It's not easy proving you're a different person. Xena
That's what friends do we stand by each other when there's trouble. Gabrielle
I believe everyone will find their tree in the forest someday even you. Gabrielle
I find the strongest trees in the forest stand alone.
Sometimes it's good for the soul to be soft. Gabrielle
The road is a hard place to live not knowing where you'll sleep what you'll eat. Xena
To care for a wounded woman is not an act of war. Darius
I've been looking for my best friend. Maybe you've seen here six feet tall, dark hair, lots of leather, she rides like the harpies in a bad mood. Gabrielle
Sometimes you have to stand and fight. Xena
Trees
Believing everyone will find their tree
Saved a little boy's life
Wounded in the process
A good man wanting a simple life
Raising his children
Tempted to stay
Leaving Gabrielle behind
A bad boy she meets
Cute and quite the kisser
Finds out the truth
Helps him realize his true path
Not such a bad boy after all
Helpful Tips: Rip slit in dress for easier ass kicking. Never leave without your chakram.
Gabrielle Chops Wood
You think you're man enough to test my blade. Do you? Your type are all cowards. I've met and defeated tens of hundreds of your type. Come on make your move or maybe you're waiting for me to make the first move. First mistake. Well that's your mistake waiting for my mistake cause I don't make mistakes. Let that be a lesson to you.
Taken
She was spirited off
Only girl in town
A young innocent
Free of bloodshed
Caused a distraction
Gone without a trace
Off to be Morpheus' bride
Put through a series of test
Tricked into killing
Is what they desire
Damned if she does
Sacrificed as his bride
Talks her way through
Does what she does best
Gets in a good punch in the end
Helpful Tip: A breast dagger makes you appear bigger without a trip to a sorcerer to enchance your motives.
She's The One
With a dark past
She has the power
Able to defeat him
Into the dream passage
To get her best friend
Past comes surging up
Haunted by past demons
Able it change it
She can control it
Faced with herself
The dark part of her
Can't survive without it
Is what she comes to realize
Black Eyed Girl
Oh you know me. You know me better than any opponent you've ever faced. This might be your dreamscape but you can't control me. I am you. You can't go through that door until you have the key. And you can't go throughlife trying to deny that I'm the real you. We were so happy all those years don't you remember? Putting fear into all them. Pushing aside those who stood in our way. Taking what we wanted. Ah those were the days. Oh well let me ask you this back then didn't it feel right? Everything we did felt right. It felt good. Oh how would you know. You think this goody goody act of your's is gonna last? No glory in being a hero ask around. You're weak without me Xena. That fire is still there. Join me.
You take everything for granted all your gifts and talents. Me. Everything you are today came from me. Every spark of noble quality that made you a great leader. Me. The strength that made men tremble at your name. It all came from me!
A Family
A prophecy foretold
A widowed king
Lost his child too
An orphaned baby
Needing a home
Woman with a burden
Unable to have a life
A family was formed
Safe place for the box
A baby to love
With two loving parents
Given the name Gabriel
The king's heir
Prophecy will be fulfilled
In my experience cowardly mobs are usually led by weasels. Xena
Hey you fight. I talk. We each have our gifts. Gabrielle
Hope is and always will be safe. It's inside each and every one of us. Xena
Gabrielle's Thoughts
You see Xena the way I look at it. Life is to be explored and without adventure what's the point? Granted with you sometimes it gets a bit too adventurous, but that's what makes it interesting. Who was it that said, "If curiousity is the food of life, then adventure is a meal?"
Xena's Advice
You're new at this so listen up. Anyone coming into a place like this carrying a bag of gold is looking to live a short life with a messy death.
How Argaranon Meets His Jana
I was out for a ride. No it was a hot summer day. And no woods. I was getting a drink from a spring when her reflection suddenly appeared. I though it was the Water Goddess Panope. Then I looked up and I saw it was someone far more beautiful. She smiled. From that moment on I dedicated my life to making that smile appear as often as possible.
The Past
Went back to her roots
Meeting an old flame
The sparks are still there
Stirring up old feelings
Lying to someone dear
To save a princess
And prevent a war
Something changed inside him
One final act of sheer goodness
Saved the girl's life
And giving his own
Marcus On Walking Away
But I tried leaving once. I was in a raiding party. Some old man was begging us to spare his grandson, who was crippled. And one of my men said, ok. Cut the kid's head off. You would never kill defenseless people. I always respected that. And I never really got it until that day. So I walked away, I thought for good. I wasn't cut out for it, pure and simple. So I said, fine, not for me. So I came back.
Step One: You do one good thing for no other reason than you know it's right.
On Trial
Fought a hooded figure
Disappeared without a trace
Leaving behind death
Standing all covered in blood
Accused of murder
Put on trial
Ares playing his game
Makes her an offer
Takes him up on it
Brings the men back to life
Was set free
Helpful Tips: If a person is standing over a person and her hands are bloody and says that we need to stop the bleeding then she's not the killer because what would be the point. You'd just kill and go off on your merry way. You hear clashing of swords when there are two swords so hello there were obviously two people you morons. Swords cut through rope like butter so don't bother hiding in the trees to lasso her since she can't just cut the ropes. When getting payback for your best friend hitting you aim higher otherwise you'll just hurt your hand on her breastplate. Maybe stand on something for a better punch.
Ares On Xena's Destiny
Your destiny is to rule the world with me. Fulfill your destiny. And fille me again with the delicious sight of you. The warmth. The strength of you.
With an army like that you can mold the world anew eradicating justice. You can't tell me that all this holds no attraction. Even maybe a slight fascination. A world of peace under a great leader. You. And to bring this all about you need only call out my name. Call upon me to help you and I shall be there instantly. I seriously doubt you're going get a better offer. Just call for my help Xena and you'll hold the world. And you better hurry that crowd doesn't seem as fond of you as I am.
You want more than just living. Danger excites you and as you know I am somewhat dangerous. Action and power draw you like a moth to a flame. It burns inside you. I burn inside you. You can feel it like a fever.
No not just any warrior. You'll be the architect of a new world. My kind of world where force of arms keeps the peace and one great Warrior Queen rules.
Awakening
Goes into a cave
Releases the Titans
Three who honor her
Here to do what she wishes
Wanting to help out
Things go very wrong
One ends up dying
Killed by the other
One despises humans
Wants the rest released
The scroll is read
Turned back into stone
Don't be sorry just improve. Xena
Helpful Tips: When being chased by a Titan don't look back just run like Tartarus. Head off to the temple that honors their brother Cronos which is holy land to them and they won't go there.
The Titans
In Greek religion and mythology, one of twelve primeval deities. The female Titan is also called Titaness. The Titans six songs and six daughters were the children of Uranus and Gaea. They were Kronos, Iapetus, Hyperion, Oceanus, Coeus, Creus, Thei, Rhea, Mnemosyne, Phoebe, Tethys, and Themis. The name Titan was sometimes applied to their descendents, such as Promethus, Atlas, Hecate, Selene, and Helios. The Titans, led by Kronos, deposed their father and ruled the universe. They were in turn overthrown by the Olympians, led by Zeus, in the battle called the Titanomachy. Zeus freed from Tartarus the Cyclopes and the hundred-handed giants, the Hecatoncheires, to aid him in the war. The cyclopes forged Hades helmet of darkness, Poseidon's trident, and Zeus' thunderbolts. With these weapons Zeus and his brothers were able to defeat the Titans. After the struggle Zeus sent Kronos to rule the Isle of the Blessed and condemned Atlas to bear the sky on his shoulders. Prometheus (and in some myths, Oceanus and Themis), because he sided with Zeus, was allowed to remain on Olympus, but all the other Titans were condemned to Tartarus.
Source: Columbia Encyclopedia
The bards say that if ever Prometheus is bound than mankind starts to lose the gifts he gave us. Gabrielle (Fire and the ability to heal oneself.)
Suicide Mission
Screams of Promtheus
Captured in chains
Trip to an Oracle
Off to get the sword
The only way to free him
Die upon contanct
Willing to give her life
To release him
Given back the gifts
That he gave to mankind
Working as a team
They manage the deed
Without any death
Free once again
All is well once more
Oracle
If you want to free Promethus you must go to Vulcan Mountain and enter the cave of Hephaestus. There you will find a sword. It's the only tool that can break the chains that binds them.
You're not much for girl talk are you? Of course you're not like most girls. Gabrielle
Hercules there's something I've been wanting to say to you for a long time. You changed my life. You taught me how to live. I'll never forget you for that. Thanks. Xena
Gabrielle if you see Xena again will you tell her something for me? Just in case. Tell her there are no hard feelings. I'm proud to have known her.
Celesta
Death's been captured
Away from her flame
If it runs out
Death will be no more
Unable to die
Those in severe need
Can't pass on to the other side
Doomed to eternal torment
Needs to be restored
Can't live without her
In a few hours Celesta's eternal flame will burn out. If you don't release her before that happens eternal suffering will be the fate of all mankind. Hades
Helpful Tips: It's a really bad sign when the bad guy you killed shows up again. Don't touch death unless you want to be dead yourself. Skeletons break easy so don't bother holding on since you're going to fall anyway. It's better to be trapped with a rat than have a scary dead guy after you. Send the rat to the dead guy so you're safe and sound. If you encounter a rain of rats keep your head down until they're gone.
Talus
A young man she meets
With a warm bedside manner
Tending to the injured
He captures her heart
Everything she could ever want
But a secret he carries inside
Pain in his chest so pounding
He's dying himself
Just waiting for his release
Off to the other side
With a tearful farewell
He heads off with Celesta
Talus On Death
You shouldn't fear it. I did for the longest time but now my suffering has grown so real. Now I know death can be a friend, a resting place.
Don't you see it's now how long you live that matters it's how well you live.
I'm A Princess
To a forest they came
Out of the trees
Some Amazons came
Hands clasped above
The symbol for peace
Asking for permission to pass
Off to the Queen they go
Arrows started to fly
Dashing off to the trees
One dropped down
Off she ran to her
Threw herself down to save her
Bravery was noted
Rite of Caste was given
Hey don't judge a scroll by its paper. Gabrielle
Only fools and profiteers ask for war Gabrielle. Centaurs are neither. Xena
Helpful Tips: Centaurs don't eat hay. They carry their weight on their front hooves. Ask what's in the bag before you open it to avoid an ick moment.
Making war is simple. Making peace is never easy. If it was everyone would do it. Xena
Gabrielle's Thoughts
I just thought it would be great to be an Amazon. I didn't realize what it meant. But I've learned my lesson. Everything I know you know. From now on no more secrets. You know I just thought of something. You're a Warrior Princess and I'm an Amazon Princess that's gonna make such a great story. Yeah and it all starts with you and me finding the signs on the trees and then...Xena hey wait. And then the arrows came flying down.
Causes are only lost when people give up. Xena
Arrested
Wanting to be jailed
She grabs a tomato
Finall throws it
Man arrested instead
Gruel in the face
Does the trick
Tossed in jail
Like she wanted
Bearing some gifts
Chakram under her hat
The whip around he waist
And sword at her back
Hidden beneath her shirt
A massive break out
The truth is revealed
About the identity
Flora's the Black Wolf
Helpful Tip: Don't assume it's always a he since it could turn out to be a she.
Xena's Wisdom
You have to have faith in yourself Flora otherwise you spend the rest of your life waiting for other people to offer their hand to you.
Sometimes the best place to hide is out in the open.
See those pointy ends of these swordy things the guards are carrying? Stay away from them. Gabrielle
Familiar Faces
Wanted to go to Troy
Got her wish
Face to face with Perdicus
Who she was to marry
Thrust into a war
To help an old friend
Fighting over a woman
So many senseless deaths
Years of misery and death
A river of blood flowing
Finally ended at last
She's free at last
To go where she chooses
Free to decide for once in her life
Helpful Tips: A bench is excellent for whacking and escaping from the dungeon. If something very large is given as a gift don't let it in since there are men hiding inside just waiting for you to get drunk. Even family will betray you so be careful who you trust.
You know it's not polite to interrupt a bard when she's relating a heroic tale. Gabrielle
Competition
Telling stories in a tavern
Mention of a competition
Decides to sign up
Doing her bard thing
Getting the chance
Make a dream come true
Studying at the academy
Wowed the masses
Decided to travel instead
Living future adventures
Just waiting to be written down
Storytelling isn't diction. It's the story.
All artists suffer for their art. Gabrielle.
Great Storytelling
Great stoytelling it comes from our observations of life. As I was saying how do we translate an event into a riveting, engaging story? That is the goal of the bard!
Gabrielle's Thoughts
You see the real story would be now, if you were really dead because most people think of death as the end. When in fact death can be the beginning of a wonderful tale.
And to learn not to fear death but to accept it as part of life. You see there was no moral to you faking your death.
It's just well when I tell a story I like it to have a nice ending. You know sap up the wrap up.
But it's only half the story. You see inside all of us there's a yearning to do good, to be good. And it's the same with the Warrior Princess. The child should have meant nothing but it was the beginning for Xena. With a past as harsh and unwillingness to change her own men put her through a gauntlet of death. But now that good has taken root the will to survive was too great her destiny now was to fight for the innocent and that is what she's done. And that Xena became good.
Art will never take second places to rules and regulations.
Stop focusing on the destination. It's the journey that's the fun part. Gabrielle
Treasure
Looking for the clues
An old friend was murdered
Thrown together
Getting the treasure
The one who spurned her
Not so terrible
Gave up his life
To save another
Saved the bracelet
A cherished possession
Realized his mistake too late
Preventing the disaster
Of ambrosia in the wrong hands
Assassination is for pay. Murder is for kicks.
Helpful Tip: Kick the nasty man in the groin for better satisfaction.
Petracles And Xena
When Xena and I met we were very young neither of us knew what love was. We confused possession with passion. We had to own each other. I was a little better at it than she was. I asked her to marry me because I thought that was the best way to conquer her. No Gabrielle it worked. She was mine. And when I realized I had her I didn't want her anymore. Yes but I judged everything in terms of a battlefield.
Last Words: It matters to me. I was a fool not to appreciate what I had.
Looking Alike
Two so alike in looks
A princess in danger
Warrior Princess to save her
Takes her place
Sent outside the castle
A learning experience
Marriage to take place
But in love with the brother
Not sure of his feeligns
Two put together
Revealing their feelings
The wedding took place
With the loving couple
Helpful Tips
For A Princess To Become A Warrior Princess
1. Lose the ribbons. She likes dark clothes.
2. Don't say little people.
3. Don't cry and whine. That isn't very fitting for a Warrior Princess.
4. Stand up straight and put your shoulders back.
5. Don't ride the horse side saddle since that's a total giveaway.
6. Sleeping on the ground is a normal part of a warrior's existence.
7. Don't run away crying for papa because no warrior does that.
For A Warrior Princess To Become A Princess
1. Sometimes flowers are just flowers especially if they are carried by the guy the princess was raving about.
2. The princess faints at the sight of blood so act all woozy or your cover will be blown.
3. Endure the tedious hair brushing although brushing your hair for 2000 strokes isn't good for the hair at all.
4. A princess tends to not to be able to fight.
5. Lose the battle cry if you have to fight and make sure you aren't seen fighting since that would give you away.
6. If you find out the princess can play the harp improvise by breaking the strings. Later on it'll make an excellent weapon for a bunch of arrows to catch the bad guy.
Helpful Tips: If someone looks like a used chariot salesmen then be suspicious. A suicide victim would have a chair in their room unless it's murder. Make a toast to guage the reactions of the people in the room.
Toast
To the end of slavery in Liberia. To the end of corruption in our kingdoms. Death to traitors in our midsts!
Diana's Thoughts
This experience will enrich me and allow me to better rule my kingdom. Yes at last I am one of the little the ordinary people and when I'm queen I won't be locked away in my catle. No I will go out to my people and I will share their simple joys and I'll know their hearts.
Helpful Tips: Don't call one of your subjects a horrible little man. Don't throw a chakram when you don't even know what to call it.
Round Killing Thing
This it's my round killing thing. I use it to fight evil. Well like the time when I had to kill a lot of centaurs. Not centaurs I mean cyclopes, hundreds of them. I took care of them with my trusty round thing.
Diana's Thoughts
You were right. They're not little at all. They're grand and they're warn and they deserve so much more from us.
In Deep
Man she loves
Asks for her help
Souls in danger
In she jumps
Swims to the other side
Given a reprieve
Alive again for two days
Reconnectiong their love
Got the helmet back
Killed him again
A second judging
For his goodness
He got his reward
Put in the Elysian Fields
Where he belongs
I might be dead but I'm not gonna let you mutliate me without a fight. Xena
Helpful Tips: You can't touch the dead so it's no use trying to fight them. Look for footprints in the sand to know where the crazy psycho with the helmet is. The advantage of being invisible is in the daylight since at night it's hard to see anyone.
The Chest
Hiring the best
The King of Thieves
Used his ego
Got him to agree
Went undercover
As his assistant
He made with the skimpy for her
Spouting off philosophy
A definite attraction
Put the money back
A thief with a heart
Helpful Tips: Rock sugar looks like a diamond in the sunlight and will attract the attention of a certain thief. Tie the feet as well as the hand since he'll be only focused on his hands and he'll trip. Use his ego against him. Don't fear the truth face it. If you turn away you turn to ashes in a flamey bitter end. Make sure the guy you're impersonating is nowhere around to avoid a killer headache. Don't even try for a kiss only on the hand.
Heads Home
Freezes in a danger moment
Decides to go home
Looking for some answers
A long way to go
She gets a ride
Using her wit
She finally gets lucky
Makes her way to Potedia
Finding quite a sight
Not what she expected
Her village in danger
Uses knowledge gained
Makes her way back to Xena
With her confidence restored
Hey, you know the Orpheus legend how he plays music so well it moves mountains? Now, I know it's a myth, but there's often a kernel of truth in even the wildest story. Gabrielle
Nothing like a good ambush to liven things up. Xena
Helpful Tips: If you hit the wrong guy with a rock it might end badly. Don't pull off the drunk guy's boots near stairs since you may fall down them which is never any fun. It's good to actually know the name of the village you're defending and also to be sober. A meat skewer can be used as a weapon.
Gabrielle Learned A Lot
Yes she did. She taught me when to fight, when to talk. She taught me how to know the difference between a friend and an enemy. She taught me what it means to have a best friend. Because some things can't be taught. Some things you either have or you don't. Like the connection you can only feel with your sister. Xena can't teach me that. I already have it.
Lila Gets Tough
Listen to me! I'm no hero, believe me. But the way I see it we have two choices we either take a stand and possibly die, or we surrender and die for sure! It's time to stop talking and start fighting!
Helpful Tips: Throw food. Have ropes to trip the bad guys up on. Toss boiling oil from above and throw the pot on their heads. Lure guys in with dancing so they fall into the trap set and start smacking with frying pains. Fake like you're running away so they run into a trap and have a bunch of logs falling on them. Add special javelines for some good skewering. A rake also comes in handy.
Lila's Wisdom
Your dreams are elsewhere. Gabrielle, you are destined for great things. Your heart belongs on the road, not here in this little village. If you stay here, your life will never be complete. Live life, Gabrielle. Don't let it pass you by. It doesn't take an oracle to realize that you belong out there in the world, with Xena, helping to change people's lives for the better, like you did here.
Jealousy
Angry young man
Pretends to be God
Ordering to kill
The beloved youngest son
A father drugged
To easily fool
Struggles with this
Drugged nut bread
Has her talking to rocks
High on henbane
Lost the loud talking thing
Heard the voice
Never wants to feel that way again
Has a killer headache
Look do me a favor ok if you ever see me take a drug just kill me. Gabrielle
Disguise
A face from the past
Claims to be her father
Wanting her as always
His greatest desire
Gradually gains her trust
His beaten bloody body
Fills her with blood lust
Takes over the army
Nearly gets her back
Sense knocked into her
Rejects him yet again
Ares On Xena
I thought about it for a long time. What could I do to win you back money, power? What was your weaknes? And then it came to me daddy. It was so glorious. You did everything I wanted. You killed soldiers. You even left your pesky little friend for me. I knew the ruthless warrior was still inside you. And now you're back where you belong. This is your army Xena. I had it created for you and it feels good doesn't it leading an army into battle for the glory of Ares. I know what's in your heart. There's a reason why I play the part of Atrius so well. What is a father Xena? A man who guides you, who teaches you how to live your life. I did it all for you and I'll never let you go. Think you're playing with me now. So foolish wasted your talents on these pitiful villagers. I'll make it easy for you join me or die. Oh Xena you could have had it all. I think one day you will. Until next time Xena. Until next time.
Gabrielle I want you to understand something. We both have families we were born into but sometimes families change and we have to build our own. For me our friendship binds us closer than blood ever could. Xena
Poison Dart
Hit in the neck
By an unknown enemy
Doesn't say a word
There to help out
Villagers in danger
Warlord out for revenge
Growing weak from the poison
She barely makes her escape
An imposter to take her place
Seeming to be dead
Grief stricken yet determined
Makes a plan
Awakes just in time
To save the day
The Greater Good
It's not about me. It's about these people. That's why we're here. People like this used to be my victims. I keep that in mind every time we come up against a warlord like Talmadaus. It's the greater good remember that.
Imposter
Out to ruin her re
She led an army
Tales of bloodshed
All done in her name
With a thirst for revenge
She's out to destroy her
Gets caught and jailed
Makes her escape
When a torch is thrown
Blazing in her cell
Grabbing Gabrielle off she goes
A fight to the death
Is what she most desires
Saved in the end
Brought to justices
Taken off to jail
Xena On Syra
It was just another village to conquer nothing out of the ordinary. A fire broke out and I don't know if it was one of my men or just an accident. There was a strong wind and those flames just swept through that town like a wave of death. The people were huddled in their houses because they were afraid of my army. That was one time where my army was responsible for the death of women and children. There was just a handful of survivors. Obviously Callisto was one of the,.
There's only one way to end the cycle of hatred and it's through love and forgiveness. Gabrielle
Callisto's Thoughts
I'm a painful reminder of who you used to be and how you may never leave it behind. Ooh that crowd wants my blood. Why not let them have me it's the easy way out. Nobody will blame you. You know there used to be some respect mixed up in my hatred for you but not anymore. Your petty scruples are an embarrassment. As a villian you were awesome. Ad a hero you are a sentimental fool. Perfect I'm gonna die just like my family kinda full circle don't you think? Oh no, no, no not to fear Xena I won't be screaming out like my sister.
In a way I'm disappointed Xena. There was a part of me that hoped you would win and put out the rage in my heart. Sometimes it even scares me then I get over it.
Xena On Catching Arrows
Stop trying to it's not something you can think your way through. It's your body that has to listen.
The Mask
Stopped the arrow
Listened with her body
Wearing a mask
Blast from the past
Those who razed her village
Put her on that path
Twisting her into badness
Determined to bring him down
Reunion with big brother
Made a pretty good team
Went home to see mother
Xena Wisdom
Maybe it's just a difference in my head but the pure evil of murder is that it's premeditated. It's not in the heat of battle and it's not for self defense. You have been planning this for years.
I can't bear to think of all the innocents who suffer because of this madness. Someone has to stop it. No Xena not even you can stop an entire way. All right I didn't mean that as a challenge. Gabrielle
Helpful Tip: Be careful what you say.
Lives By Her Own Code
A brush with death
Doing things her own way
She stopped breathing
Unwilling to give up
She urges her to fight
Comes back with a gasp
Alive and kicking
Saw Talus and her uncle too
In her brief journey to the Elysian Fields
Xena's Thoughts
The Gods don't care if these men live or die. I spent a lot of time healing on the battlefield and you could help a lot more people if you spent more time with them and less with your God.
Xena's Wisdom
You need to separate out the ones who can be saved from the ones who can't. You have no choice.
Hippocrates
c460-370 BC, Greek physician recognized as the father of medicine. He is believed to have been born on the island of Cos, to have studied under his father, a physician, to have traveled for some time, perhaps studying in Athens, and to have returned then to practice, teach and write at Cos. The Hippocratic or Coan school that formed around him was of enourmous importance in separating medicine from superstition and philisophic speculation, placing it on a strictly scientific plane based on objective observation and critical deductive reasoning. Although Hippocrates followed the current belief that disease resulted from an inbalance of the four bodily humors, he maintained that the disturbance was influenced by outside forces and that the humors were glandular secretions. He believed that the goal of medicine should be to build the patient's strength through appropriate diet and hygienic measures, resorting to more drastic treatment only when the symptoms showed this to be necessary. This was in contrast with to the contemporary Cnidian school, which stressed detailed diagnosis and classification of diseases to the point of ignoring the patient. Hippocrates probably had an inkling of Mendelian and genomic factors, in heredity because he noted not only many of the signs of a disease but also that symptoms could appear throughout a family or community, or even over successive generations.
Of the large collection of writings that derived from the Coan school only a few are generally ascribed to Hippocrates, himself although his influence is felt throughout. Of these the Aphorisms, summing up his observations and deductions, and Airs, Waters, and Places which recognized alink between environment and disease, are considered the most important. The collection has appeared in a number of translations notably that of Littre.
While the Hippocratic Oath cannot be directly credited to him either, it undoubtedly represents his ideals and principles. The oath which still governs the ethical conduct of physicians today, is often recited at the graduation ceremony of medical schools. Among other things the oath details codes of patient's right to privacy, asks the physician to pledge to lead an honorable professional and personal life, and requires that he or she prescribes treatments only for curative purposes.
Medicine's not my strong suit. I'm a bard. Gabrielle
Life is only what you make of it. Gabrielle
Ephiny's Lesson
Fantes was once my sworn enemy and I learned forgiveness. And from that I learned love. I just hope my child grows up to live in a world free from your blind hatred. I don't despise you but you got to think of the children is bloodshed all you want them to know.
Helpful Tip: Take the southern route.
Gabrielle's Thanks
Xena I wanted to thank you for saving my life again. You always seem to be doing that. How could I leave you when we have so many wars and despots to foil. You're gonna need my help. You're not gonna believe this but I had the most amazing dream when I was on the other side. There was this green peaceful pasture with these beautiful trees and I saw my grandmother and my uncle Moreaus. You wanna hear about it? And Talus was there oh he said hello by the way...
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